Category Archives: Newbies

How to “Dress To Impress” for Men

Man adjusting his collar of a suit jacket

What we wear to a Lifestyle event sets the tone for an evening out when meeting new people. Wearing comfortable street clothes can tell others that you couldn’t be bothered to dress up for the occasion, and that might translate into others thinking you might not be the most dynamic lover. On the other hand, dressing up and paying attention to details can communicate to others that you are an attentive lover with an eye on detail. It’s all in the perception.

Of course, at a house or pool party, the dress code may call for casual clothing, so do consider that. But at classier house, hotel and private parties, and especially at swinger clubs, the “Dress to Impress” credo is important to follow if you want to impress and connect with others.

We found a forum post on swingersboard.com that talks about this, so we thought we’d use it as a basis for this blog post. You can see the whole thread here, but the following excerpts are taken from there, as we thought the poster had some great advice for men! Of course, we added our own input as well to round out the topic.

First, things to avoid when ‘Dressing to Impress’.

  • Running shoes. If you wear them to the grocery store, to cut the grass or to walk the dog, it’s not appropriate. We also suggest avoiding flip flops and cheap sandals, as this does not read as ‘sexy’, just ‘comfortable’.
  • Ball caps. Even if you wear a hat daily or it’s your favorite team, leave it at home. If you must wear a hat, make it fun and creative, like a fedora. It will cover your bald spot just as well and could be a good conversation starter.
  • Especially worn, torn and/or faded denim. Again, if you lounge around your home in them, cut the grass or go camping in them, they are not for the club. The only jeans you should consider – and again, we suggest you just avoid denim altogether as it is not a dressy material – would be designer jeans that fit you properly.

Now, on to the great suggestions:

  • Shoes. These are your foundation. They should be comfortable (nothing sexy about a grimacing face on the dance floor), and easy to move in. Leather or suede show class and taste, although many men’s shoe choices are fabric now. Choices could be: dress shoes, or on-trend slip-ons, chukka’s, ankle boots and the like are a start.
  • Socks. They need to have been purchased sometime in the last 2 years. Don’t be afraid of colors, and fun patterns that can also be a good conversation starter. Black shoes = black/grey/navy base socks. Brown shoes = brown/tan/earth tone socks.

Brown leather mens shoes and a matching belt

  • Belt. Should RELATE to the shoe color. Leather is best. Wider belts on less dressy pants and even jeans can elevate the look. Bling or a fun buckle can be good, but don’t go overboard with size or flash. Subtle is better. And hey, this could have the ladies looking down at your crotch. That can’t be a bad thing!
  • Underwear. Bought in the last year. Don’t be afraid to go with bold colors or prints. Black is a sure bet and looks great on everyone. Try fitted ‘boy shorts’ or boxer briefs with a little elastic in the fabric to keep its shape. These really hug the boys, give support and look great when flaccid or aroused. Boxers may be more comfortable, but not nearly so sexy when disrobing in the playroom. And let’s face it… you love it when she’s wearing something sexy under that dress…. why not have a sexy surprise for her too?
  • Pants. Lots of options here, in color, fabric, and cut. Avoid denim as previously stated. Pleated fronts are not flattering and make the wearer balloon out unnaturally in the middle, creating an unflattering profile. Flat front pants are more flattering on more body types. Casual chic dress slacks that aren’t business focused are everywhere these days and look great. Dress flat-front Khaki’s in non-tan colors are popular and look good. A slack with some pattern that is subtle can also be nice. If you’re only going to get one pair, black goes with everything. But colors can be fun too: reds, burgundy, greens, dark brown, etc.
  • Shirts. Way more options here. Dress To Impress usually implies a shirt with a collar, so avoid T-shirts. Think non-button-down collared dress shirts (the kind without buttons on the collar), which can be suit dressy, or casual without a tie. Our original poster suggests avoiding Polo shirts, even though they are collared, as they belong on the golf course. But, if the choice is between a T and a Polo, then go with the collar. Another suggestion is a black stretch T, which means ‘fitted’, under an open, button-down knit. This adds a nice layered effect and can hide a few extra pounds. Consider wearing something that has a slight texture to it. The ladies may be drawn to touch it, and who doesn’t like a little contact
  • Jacket. Weather will dictate this. Try a nice, unstructured blazer. The fit is key, guys. Don’t go a size larger, as this just reads as ‘dumpy’.
  • Accessorize. Have a nice watch? Wear it, it speaks volumes. Most people use their phones as their timepiece, but in a busy club many people won’t have theirs on hand, so this could be a good ice breaker. “Excuse me, do you have the time?”
  • Finishing Touches. (directly from the original post, cuz hey! We agree wholeheartedly!) “Your feet are self-pedicured. Your fingernails are clean, clipped close, and looking good. You are always shower fresh and not heavily fragranced. And your oral hygiene (that means floss and tongue scraper) is impeccable.”

A man who dresses sharply and takes pride in his appearance translates to ‘this is a man who cares about his partner and will pay attention to detail in his lovemaking too.’ We assure you, the ladies will take notice!

Halloween Trilogy 2019 HOT DEAL!

The O Zone sign with a skeleton hanging in front of it

Halloween is usually for kids, but not at The O Zone. Our members love a chance to dress up in sexy costumes. And our Halloween trilogy is the perfect place!

Friday, Oct. 18 – Pirates & Pasties
Saturday, Oct. 19 – the infamous Monsters Bash
Friday, Oct. 25 – Devils Night
Saturday, Oct. 26 – Halloween SUPER Party
Friday, Nov. 1 – Angels Night
Saturday, Nov. 2 – Sexy Steampunk

So as you can see, there are so many costume and dress up opportunities here!

The cost for these events vary. Monster Bash and Halloween SUPER Party are each $80/couple. The Friday nights are all $40/couple. Steampunk night is $60/couple. Of course, some of those could change, based on when you arrive (cheaper if you arrive before 10 pm on Fridays and the Steampunk night) and your membership status. (first time? Sorry, no discount, but your lifetime membership is included.)

We are offering a stellar deal right now for this year’s Halloween Trilogy! Total value for these 6 events is $340, but you can purchase a pass for all 6 events, for just $100/couple! What a deal! But be warned, Monster Bash and the Halloween SUPER Party WILL sell out, so get your tickets, either individual or the Trilogy passes asap or you’ll be left on the sidewalk! Click here to purchase individual event or Trilogy passes so you can get in on the fun!!

Additionally, we are offering an additional “69 Days of Xxmas” Platinum membership that will get you into EVERY event from now until Jan 10th (NYE excluded) for an additional $100! Just $200 now gets ALL of the Halloween events, as well as all events in Nov and Dec! You can’t beat that!!

So dust off your sexiest Halloween costumes and get ready to party O Zone style!! We’ll see you there!

Code Words in the LS to Keep You Safe

Safewords are more prevalent in the BDSM lifestyle, but what about for swingers? Surely there is a time when you want to indicate to your partner that you’re a NO for what’s being offered without offending the person or couple who are offering. Maybe it’s dancing and flirting with a couple on the dance floor, and your partner is like ‘Yes? You’re interested in this person to play with tonight?” You may not want to say out loud, “No, I’m not interested” in front of them and ruin the mood or offend them. So what can you do?

Some couples have code words worked out for just such a scenario. One couple I spoke to said they use fruits as an indicator. She doesn’t like lime, so might say something like ‘I taste lime in this drink’, or ‘with a lime twist’, to indicate she’s just not feeling it with this person. With a quick comment (or even a quick whispered word “Lime” in his ear) they have communicated clearly and without offending the other couple.

Likewise, when she is interested and would like to take it further, she uses ‘strawberry’ as their positive identifier. “Boy, it would be great to have some strawberries right now!” or “I smell strawberries!” and he knows he can help move the action from the dance floor to the playroom.

Using code words between you and your partner could help take some of the awkwardness out of communicating in front of others. It’s hard to say “Honey, while these people seem perfectly nice, I’m just not interested in them.” but dropping a code word that no one but your partner knows and understand is harmless and won’t hurt anyone’s feelings.

In the kink community, they use stoplight colors to indicate a willingness to participate. Green means GO, obviously. One could use this too while at a swing club “Oh look at that couple over there. I’m GREEN with envy over her shoes!”

Yellow usually indicates something is just not quite right and is often used as an indicator that play needs to slow down. Again, in swinging this could be good to extract yourselves from play that may have already started but you no longer are feeling it, and want to stop or take a break.

And Red is an All Stop safeword. In BDSM it is expected that if one says Red as a safeword, all play halts. Both or all participants can use a safeword, not just the bottom or sub. Likewise, in the swinging lifestyle, Red can be used to indicate to your partner that ‘you gotta get me out of here now!’ or ‘I am NOT into this and I am done.’

Of course, you and your partner should have this all worked out before you arrive at a club or party, so you are on the same page and you’re not throwing out code words that they aren’t picking up on it. Use words that aren’t likely to be used at a party or event, but aren’t so out of the blue (like saying ‘Broccoli’) that the other person or couple are left scratching their heads. Also, avoid using ‘boner killer’ words or phrases, like ‘your mother called today’, or it could kill the mood entirely.

This trick isn’t for everyone obviously. But if you think it might work for you, talk to your partner about it and come up with some safe or code words that just the two of you use. If nothing else, it’ll bring you closer together as honest and open communication skills are a cornerstone for the swinging lifestyle.

Good luck and have fun!