How to Get Started in the Swing Lifestyle
We see so many new profiles being created on swinger dating sites, but too often these accounts sit fallow and do not help the couple who are seeking, so here is a little advice on ‘how to’ connect with other like-minded, LS couples.
1) Meet n Greets
Usually hosted in a regular restaurant or bar, this is a chance for members of LS groups to meet face to face, get to know other members a bit better, chat and have a few drinks. Meet n Greets are not meant (usually) to meet and hookup that evening: they are designed to let guests get to know others. From there, they can be invited to exclusive parties, etc.
2) Swinger Dating Sites
There are plenty and they differ from site to site and from country to country. It is probably best to stick to a site that is based in your general area (why join a site from the UK if you are in Canada? Can’t be many Canadian users there), or has a high concentration of users from your city or geographical area.
Many swing dating sites require users to set up an account before they can browse other members. Often setting up an account is free, at least for a limited time. This is to allow new users to poke around their site, see how it works, if it has users the guest would be interested in, and what capabilities and search engines it has. Usually after the initial, short ‘trial’ subscription, many sites require a paid membership to continue use. Or at the very least, the ‘free’ sites have limited capability, and paying for a membership will increase the usability of the site.
When setting up an account, most people use an alias or a screen name. Using an alias, that is, first names that are not your own, can cause confusion once you start meeting others. It may be a lot less work and confusion to use a screen name on accounts, and don’t disclose your actual names (and very rarely do swingers ever use their legal last names within in the lifestyle) until you meet someone face to face. Screen names often contain reference to a character trait or interest of the couple, to make it easier to remember them. Use some sort of abbreviated word(s) to describe you or your interests: CdnCpl4U (Canadian Couple for you) or RagingHormones, PerfectFit or BluEyes67 are examples of individual screen names. Some even use Initials. Mike and Sara might be MandSTonight.
3) Swinger Night Clubs
This is a great way to search for others to play with. Everyone at a club like The O Zone are into the lifestyle, at least on some level. Of course, not all club goers are full swap couples, some go just to dance and feel sexy, or to get sexy with their partner to satisfy their exhibitionism, or voyeurism as they can view others playing nearby to their own play area. Other guests are somewhere on the spectrum of swinging, whether it’s soft swap, voyeurism, or even just a place to play that isn’t home.
The easiest way to tell what other couples are into, well, is just to ask! Strike up a conversation, see if the chemistry is right, then broach the topic with a question rather than assuming. “Hey! You guys are really sexy! What are you into?” is a good way to find out. Afterall, they are there for (mostly) the same reasons you are.
4) Personal Ads
Less prevalent these days, as you just don’t know who will answer your ad. Many people who shop for play partners this way still meet someone new for the first time at a club or party rather than going to their home or inviting them into your own that first time. This is just good safety protocol. We see several couples inviting new couples to The O Zone to meet up for the first time. You don’t know who’s out there these days!
5) House or Hotel Parties
These parties are often by invite only, so you may have to meet them elsewhere, thru clubs, online swinger sites or ads. But once you have met and meet the criteria of the Hosts and are added to the invite list, you are golden! Be sure the groups intentions match your own.
Of course, some Hotel parties are advertised openly on swinger-specific sites and anyone can attend one of these for the price of admission. There is safety in numbers however, and these are usually quite large so there are many other guests to meet and get to know. Check out http://www.valentinesinniagara.com/ for one of ours, hosted every year by Tabota!
There are likely other options, but these are the big ones. Play safe and get the most out of life!!